The scoop

Fuck, man. I could get scooped. Seriously.

I've been working on my project for almost three years. Since I thought I was going to submit it last fall, I presented my findings at a poster session. I went to a conference this week, and a huge name in my field essentially presented my data. I went cold and clammy. I thought my liver was going to rupture with fury.

This project has been crazy from the start. I had a really unique finding, but no one believed me. My boss tried to get me working on something else several times. I've documented pretty well how I was met with resistance by my lab mates. At the conference where I first presented the data, I saw people pointing at my poster and laughing. I got laughed at again this week.

I was really doubting myself for a while, and honestly I was a little scared to publish the data. Part of me felt so vindicated seeing him present what are essentially my findings. His conclusions were the same as mine. The mechanism was the same. I wish that I hadn't been so scared. I've said before that data don't lie, but like most things I didn't follow my own advice. And I could pay for it.

Of course, now that this titan is trying to publish almost the exact same research I have done, it means I have more weight behind my findings. But still - the dude is so well known and so successful that I am amazed he is trying to scoop me. Isn't his success enough? Apparently not. To make the matter worse, I really idolized this guy. Talk about some bitter disappointment.

Now they don't know my paper is already submitted and in revision. I'm hoping to have it in by the end of next week. I don't think I will get rejected, because it it a very mild review. I just hope to fuck they don't have theirs submitted too. It's an arms race - and I only have two arms. He has an army.

But I have to say, it will be the best feeling in the world to scoop a big lab like that. It might be petty, but that is what keeps me even more motivated to publish than I already was. Because fuck them. They fucked with the wrong person.