Monday, August 24, 2009

What is the opposite of the blues? Maybe this...

I've been on a golden streak for a few months. That's right - MONTHS. I am not even trying to complain here. I'm just totally astonished.

Just the other day, I was thinking about how some people have a fear of failure. This boggles my mind. It is completely alien to me. I've failed so many fucking times that it's not even funny. Over and over. Big things. Little things. Some which changed my life, and some that meant nothing.

I fail pretty much every day, but that is just the nature of the big ugly beast that is science. Do an experiment and - if it works - probably only half of it worked the way you wanted it to. I worked on a protocol for four months before, meaning that it failed every day for over three and a half. I tinkered with some one or other part until it slowly began coming around. ChIP took me a long time as well. You just never know. The staff scientist says that learning any new technique will take six months. Now I don't know about that, because she might possibly be the most pessimistic creature to have ever walked the Earth, but you get the idea.

So imagine my amazement when everything has worked this summer. Everything. I don't even know what to do with myself. My lab notebook is so far behind that it's not even funny anymore. I really can't keep up with the data. It's really the best time in the world for this, since I was toying with blowing this place up and going to work on some seal or dolphin project out on some faraway beach.

And even though I want to vomit in my mouth just talking about it... the uh, the paper... Well it's pretty much wrapped up. I'm just doing statistical repeats.

So I'm getting ready for some classes this fall. I only have to take two, and they are going to be pretty easy. After that, I'm planning on taking my qualification exams. This could be an interesting few months.

I hope the gold streak continues. More than anything.